Wine Wipes

Bypassing the beer for the red wine might win you a few style points at the company dinner in the short run, but there’s an excellent chance that when your boss sees the wine stains on your teeth, he will fire your ass right there on the spot. Hey, it could happen.

Stay employed and avoid the government cheese line with Wine Wipes, the “agreeable concoction to remove that filthy wine stain,” as the makers put it. You get 15 handy wipes in a designer case, with each one made with only natural red wine-attacking ingredients. Just wipe your chompers down and it’ll be like you never chugged that bottle of Merlot at all. There’s even a mirror inside the case to make sure you didn’t miss a spot. [Purchase]