10 Things We Wish Were Real
From James Bond’s gadgets to Jessica Rabbit’s curves, man has always had a healthy supply of fantasy objects to lust over. Now, in this age of Google Glass and um, the Pizza Compass, it’s commonplace to see our wildest dreams come true. That’s why we feel totally justified in wanting to see the following 10 things go from kooky concept to ready and real. Do you agree with our list?
1. Han Solo in Carbonite Pop Tarts
Would Han Solo be a little pissed that we were taking his traumatic, near-death experience and turning it into a breakfast treat? Yeah, probably. But we hear our favorite scruffy-looking nerf-herder really enjoyed sprinkles, so, it’s a fair tradeoff. [Details]
2. Lamborghini Egoista
Designed by Walter de Silva for Lamborghini’s 50th birthday, this beautiful beast actually will exist, but like its name (Egoista means selfish in Italian), only one is being made–and that’s pretty much out of our grasp. With a 5.2-liter V10 engine and styling inspired by an Apache helicopter, we don’t mind that there’s only room for one in the Egoista—we just want it. [Details]
3. LEGO Breaking Bad Video Game
Those LEGO video games are cute and all, but they’re totally embarrassing to get caught playing if you’re a grown man. However, LEGO Breaking Bad is about as mature as it gets. Play as any character from AMC’s smash hit and cook up crystal meth, mow down baddies, and retrieve pizzas off the roof of your garage.
4. Play-Doh 3D Printer
This whole 3D printing craze is cool and all, but we’re allergic to instruction booklets with more than 300 pages. The Play-Doh 3D Printer simplifies the process while simultaneously injecting with warm & fuzzies from our childhood. [Details]
If you’re going the yacht route, subtlety is not a factor. Serbian designer Vuk Dragovic’s stunning concept luxury yacht Atreides features a retractable pool which would not let us frolic in the water while in the water, but also fill Donald Trump with a delightful amount of self-hating envy.
6. Unicorn Meat
We gotta admit, if unicorns did exist, our first instinct would be to see how they taste on the grill. With magic in every bite and providing an excellent source of sparkles, we’d gladly replace the Spam in our cupboards with this.
7. Hyundai Zombie Survival Machine
When the first words you hear about a new car are “Elantra-based” it’s easy to remain indifferent. But when we saw Hyundai’s Zombie Survival Machine, we knew we wanted one. With a spiky front-end zombie plow, armored windows, roof hatch for quick escapes, and a trunk full of weaponry, we think this would also work for our morning commute. [Details]
8. Pop Tarts Vodka
What does it say about us that Pop Tarts made it on this list twice? We’re not sure. But we are sure that a robust vodka with hints of Brown Sugar Cinnamon in a gorgeous bottle like this would find a spot on our top shelf. [Details]
OK, so Star Wars came out 36 years ago, and for some reason light sabers are still not a thing yet. Unacceptable. We’ll gladly take any training courses necessary and get all the proper permitting, but please, somebody make this happen before we quite dangerously take matters into our own hands.
Even if the show is beyond over-saturation at this point, we’d still love to see a beautiful blonde with a thing for geeks materialize. Kaley Cuoco’s Penny from The Big Bang Theory may not care for Dungeons and Dragons, but the right roll of the dice will grant you the powers to get lucky with her.